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Christmas has a curious relationship to time. It’s a different Christmas every year, and yet so much of it always stays the same. It’s all wrapped up in traditions; rituals and activities that we’ve brought forward across the generations.
And traditions come with obligations. They come with pressure to carry them out. To repeat them over and over because we did them before and we should do them again.
Things in our lives may change, but traditions, they stay locked in.
Maybe for some that’s comforting. There’s pleasure in repeating activities you enjoy, of course. But traditions also offer stability, a comforting sense of continuity.
For others, however, it can be stifling. The organisation, the expense, the obligations. Feeling forced do things and spend time with people we might not otherwise wish to. It becomes more like a chore.
It can also open old wounds.
And that’s the thing about events rooted to the past. The past starts to feel like the present. Old fights, disagreements, resentments, start to bubble up again. As you stand amongst the decorations, choose presents, gather round the table, trade pleasantries – the tension can rise up, like it never went away. And when it’s the same every year, that tension can rise to a breaking point.
Personally, I think traditions can be worth observing, but not at the price of your sanity. We shouldn’t let festivities become a burden. And traditions don’t die if we put them to one side for a time. If they have any power or meaning at all, why would they?
If the emotional and personal cost of Christmas is too high, the risk of damaging relationships too great, why not just take a year out? Give yourself a real gift – and just do whatever would feel good to you.
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How I Ruined Christmas | New Ghost Stories Podcast 35